If you and your spouse are trying to come up with a suitable custody situation for your children as you go through a divorce, there are many factors to consider. It's easy to evaluate who makes more money, who will have a nicer house, and who will live in a better neighborhood once things get settled, but you should also consider some other details to help determine how to approach custody. Thinking about one specific child-focused topic at a time can often be beneficial. In the case of your children's play dates and parties, here are some things to think about.
From a very early age and often into their teens, children will frequently attend play dates, get-togethers, and parties with other children. In the case of younger children, it's common for one parent to attend the play date or gathering from start to finish, often socializing with other parents while their children play together. Evaluate between you and your partner who typically participates in these events. They'll continue long after your divorce, so if your partner attends virtually 100 percent of these events, he or she may be better suited for more custody.
In the case of children's birthday parties, it can seem like a full-time job constantly finding out what other children want and shopping for gifts. Discuss with your partner who does the shopping in these instances. For example, perhaps your spouse has little patience for visiting children's stores and buying children's toys, so you always find yourself performing this task. This may mean that a custody arrangement that favors you is better so that your child doesn't either have to stop attending parties or perhaps even show up without a presence because of one parent's negligence.
When it comes to having play dates and parties at your home, you and your spouse should think about who is the driving force behind these events. While some families have both parents who get involved, it's often one who plays more of a role. If your spouse is the one who organizes your children's parties and goes to considerable lengths to ensure that they're memorable, you should think about setting up a custody scenario in which your spouse has custody of your children around their birthdays. You can also speak to a family attorney like Marlene Dancer Adams to help get more clarity about the factors to evaluate when choosing custody.